The scrutiny of relatives || 亲戚们的盘问 

Mar 5, 2022 | Love in Real Life

中文和英文版本语音

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How do I face my relatives when they ask me why I am not yet married?

当亲戚们问我为什么还没结婚,我该如何面对他们?

S.R and A.R. have been married for 11 years and have 3 young children. Here is what they have to say:

S.R和A.R.已经结婚11年,育有3个年幼的孩子。他们是这么说的:

Accept that these questions are rooted in care and love even if you feel pressure or anger when these topics come up. It’s ok to respond with sincerity if you can do so in a loving and respectful way. Here are some phrases you can try with your family:

谈论这些话题时即便你感到压力山大或是怒不可言,也要认可这些问题是源于关心和爱。只要有爱和尊重,就能真诚地作出回应。你可以试着和家人说以下几段话:

“I’d like to get married but none of us can direct the timing and outcome of our lives.”
“我想结婚,但谁也无法左右结婚的时间和我们生命的结局。”

“Thanks for your concern, but I haven’t even found someone suitable to spend time with yet.”
“谢谢你的关心,但我还没找到合适的人陪我共度余生。”

“I know the family wants the best for me, but relationships are not the only good thing in life so I’m trying to be patient.”
“我知道家人都想把最好的给我,但感情并不是生命中唯一的美好,所以我尽力耐心等候。”

If your family is not like-minded in your faith, remember that they may not understand why you’re waiting for someone who is also a believer. This can be difficult and painful, but it’s important to remember that we cannot expect non-believers to act like believers. Pray and ask the Father to help you have grace and patience and love when our actions seem odd to those who don’t know Jesus.

如果你家人的信仰和你的不一样,要记得他们可能不理解为什么你在等的也是一个信徒。这么做可能会很艰难很痛苦,但重要的是要记住,我们不能指望非信徒表现得跟信徒一样。当那些不认识耶稣的人觉得我们的行为看起来很奇怪的时候,要祷告并请求天父帮助你获得恩典、耐心和爱。

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